One of the times in our life when it changes more than any other is when we have a baby. We go from being an independent individual that is in control of their own time and suddenly, you’re dealing with diaper changes, lack of sleep and a lot of things that you never had to put up with before. Being a parent certainly takes a lot of selfless love and we do everything we can to get ready for the new arrival in advance. We want to know everything that we can do to care for them, including feeding and bathing them.
At some point or another in their life, all of that comes to a stop. Of course, many parents will continue to take care of their children in their own way until they are a teenager or perhaps even older but at some point or another, the child has to start taking care of themselves. Some parents find this to be a rather obvious statement but others are a little bit slow on the uptake. As it turns out, when a child officially starts adolescence at the age of 13 they are capable of doing a few things in life that many parents continue to do for years longer. Here are 7 of those things your children can do by themselves once they are 13.
1. Wake up
How many times have you stood over your teenager, rubbing their shoulders and asking them to get out of bed and get ready for school? It may seem like a harmless thing to do but you’re actually doing something that they should be doing for themselves. It is a skill that they will need to use for the rest of their life so if they haven’t started it yet, today is the day.
2. Laundry
Children have the ability to use some fairly complex electronic devices so they certainly have the ability to use a washing machine. You can start them out small if you like, perhaps only having them fold the clean items and put them away. They might even be eager to learn more.
3. Cooking
Parents often enjoy preparing meals for the family but a 13-year-old should be able to cook for themselves if necessary. Julie Lythcott-Haims, the author of How to Raise an Adult: Break Free of the Overparenting Trap and Prepare Your Kid For Success has the following to say: “Have confidence that they could make breakfast for themselves, that they could make a lunch”
4. Talking to their teachers
If there is an issue happening at school, we may step in but it isn’t always necessary to do so. If it is just a normal issue, such as not turning in their homework, the teenager should be able to handle the situation on their own.
5. Coming to the rescue
If your young teenager forget something and they feel that they will not be able to survive without it, you might want to step in but otherwise, you can let them fend for themselves. It could be forgetting a textbook or perhaps their school uniform and it isn’t always necessary to drop everything in your life and take care of it.
6. Cleaning
Your job description does not include being a maid and a 13-year-old should be able to take care of their own household chores. Even though they may not be in a position to clean the entire home, they can chip in and help with some dusting or vacuuming. “It’s a wonderful way to delegate responsibility and keep the household moving forward,” says Stephanie O’Leary, PsyD, a clinical psychologist and author of Parenting in the Real World.
7. Micromanaging self-care
“By the time your kid is in high school, they really ought to be able to do everything related to their own care, if they had to,” Lythcott-Haims said. Some of the things that they can care for themselves include cleaning up the shower after they are done, making their bed and doing all of those little things that you know that they can do if they really wanted to. What may be considered small may differ from one teenager to another but by the time they are 13, you should know.