When most of us think about Thanksgiving, we think about a time of year when we get together with family and close friends in order to show our appreciation for the things we have in life. Unfortunately, it doesn’t turn out that way for every family and for the Debbs family, it will now be remembered as a time in which one of the family members lost their lives. It’s sad but true, but the parents are doing all that they can to help spread the word and keep it from happening to others.
It happened when 11-year-old Oakley Debbs was celebrating Thanksgiving and preparing for the holiday with his family. He made a decision and unfortunately, it was something that ended up costing him his life. He was experiencing some symptoms during the time that he was ill and his parents missed the opportunity to give him some medicine that may have saved his life. Now they are doing their part to help other people by spreading the word.
The family was preparing to head up to Maine to celebrate Thanksgiving with family. They wanted to make it as easy as possible for everybody who was involved. There was a food basket that was filled with plenty of treats, including a poundcake that was to be served for dessert. When they were preparing dinner, the cake was put in the corner of the counter and nobody paid much attention to it. After all, a turkey was cooking in the oven.
Oakley, however, turned his attention to the cake and it was a fatal mistake. He was an asthmatic child and had a mild allergy to peanuts and tree nuts, but it hadn’t been too much of a problem up to that point. He looked at the cake carefully and didn’t see any nuts on top so he thought it was safe and took a piece. Within minutes he was experiencing an allergic reaction.
He told his mother, Merrill, and they looked at the ingredients and there were walnuts in the recipe. She gave her son a Benadryl to help calm the reaction he was having and there was a single hive on his face. The symptoms disappeared but they were not gone permanently. His mother said:
“It went away. Whatever was going on inside of him we had no knowledge of. He seemed fine. He went out to play with his cousins, took a shower and brushed his teeth.”
When they were getting for ready for bed, Oakley came into the bedroom and said he was getting sick again. That is when the problems really started to happen. Anaphylactic symptoms appear very quickly and the mother had no time to react. She dialed 911 but unfortunately, the night only got worse.
“He started throwing up and from there it was a tornado of issues. We called 911. By the time the ambulance got there – about 10 minutes later- he was blue.”
The anaphylaxis returned without any warning in this time, it was much worse. By the time the first responders arrived, they couldn’t do anything. They give him two shots of epinephrine, which is the medication inside of an EpiPen but it was too late to really do anything to help. He battled for his life for four days in the hospital but unfortunately, he died.
The mother kept going over the day in her mind. They had an EpiPen for their son but he didn’t have the symptoms that let them know he was having a severe allergic reaction. That is why she chose a Benadryl instead of giving him a shot. Now that she has done her research, she realizes that the epinephrine should have been given to him right away.
Dr. Ruchi Gupta is an associate professor of pediatrics at Northwestern University’s Feinberg school of medicine. He is also the director of the Food Allergies Outcomes Program at Northwestern. He said that such a delayed reaction is a rather unusual subject.
“We do not know enough about delayed reactions like these that seem to get better but then progress rapidly to death. That is why it is so critical to know how to identify a reaction and when and how to use epinephrine.”
The family has decided to deal with their loss in a way that may help others. They gave a positive statement that was penned from the viewpoint of their son. The letter asked friends and family to do the following:
“Love, love and more love. You are all so beautiful. Thank you, everyone, for being with me, especially during this time. I appreciate how strong you have been for me. No one could have done anything else Wednesday night. No one is to blame. If you think you are… DON’T. Don’t PLEASE
Thank you for everyone wanting to help me. Having a family so thoughtful and caring who loves to laugh makes me the happiest boy. Support each other with determined hearts. Be there to support or to be held. It is the way to get through this time. I am grateful to be part of this family. I am blessed by the grace of God to be in it..
Be cheerful happy and enthusiastic. Show your courage, be at peace. Love your life and live it. That is the best thing you can do for me
Look for me in the rainbow I will always be there.'”
There is nothing that could ease the pain that the family is feeling but the mother is hopeful that her son’s death will inspire schools to pass a ban on nuts. The foundation she started is called ‘Red Sneakers’ and it is there to educate others about the dangers associated with food allergies.
It’s their way of honoring their son’s life.
You can watch this little girl give herself an EpiPen during an anaphylactic response in the video below: