Anytime you put yourself out there and say something publicly, you open yourself up to the possibility of ridicule. This is something that many of us experience, especially when it comes to social media.
Celebrities are no different and since they have millions of followers and are known by so many people around the world, the ridicule is usually difficult to handle. Amber Heard is finding this out in a very difficult way.
After claiming that she was abused by her ex-husband, Johnny Depp, the Internet really had an opinion on it. Although the lawsuits and trials are still going on, it is obvious that there was some monkey business going on at some point or another.
The problem is, after the lawsuits were filed and everything went public, it became a target for anyone who wanted to poke fun at it. As you can imagine, there were a lot of emotional moments to date in that court trial, and social media has posted many of them. Problem is, they don’t always have the healthiest things to say about it.
There are always going to be people on either side of the situation but many who don’t believe Heard are some of those that are heard the most on social media. People began mocking her and experts are sounding a warning as a result. They are saying that they are doing more than laughing at a single individual, they are laughing at anyone who ever was a victim of abuse.
According to Laura Palumbo, communications director at the National Sexual Violence Resource Center, “In the commentary, it’s almost as if people are forgetting that this is real life, that this is not a show that we’re all watching. Many victims of domestic violence and sexual assault will go into a courtroom at some point and have an experience that is largely outside of their control, in a setting like this.”
The stereotypes that are coming out of the woodwork as a result of the trial are rather shocking. Experts say that it may be bad news for any who are abused, as it could lead to their silence out of fear of ridicule coming their way.
Palombo went on to say: “There’s such a strong desire in the public discourse for her to be the villain, for her to be the example of the fact that there are victims who have ulterior motives, that there are victims who are not telling the full truth. It doesn’t seem like there’s a lot of folks thinking critically or wanting to understand the nuances of abuse or of unhealthy relationships.”
One of the social media platforms where this is seen in a big way is TikTok. It can be seen by the hashtags that are followed. For example, almost 10 billion people have viewed #JusticeForJohnnyDepp but very few have viewed a similar hashtag for his ex-wife.
Rather, they are coming up with hashtags for Amber Heard, such as #amberheardcancelled, #amberheardsucks, and #amberheardistrash.
According to Johnny Depp, she was the aggressor and she even went so far as to cut his finger off with a glass bottle. She is claiming otherwise, saying that she was the victim of his odd behavior throughout their relationship that included some sexual abuse, as well as physical and mental abuse.
People are always going to have an opinion, but it seems as if things got worse while the trial was ongoing. Palombo said: “Ironically, the op-ed that led to the defamation trial was her talking about the consequences she faced speaking publicly about the abuse she said she experienced by someone who was so beloved and respected and connected in Hollywood. Now we see that playing out in a very extreme way.”
According to experts, abuse occurs due to an imbalance of power. Domestic abuse typically has a primary person who is an aggressor and has more power than the other. The type of violence that they display does differ, but it often has a similar outcome.
“Within an abusive relationship, where there is harm being perpetuated and harm being experienced simultaneously, it can be difficult for folks to get help because it doesn’t fit the cultural idea that there’s a clear victim, a clear villain and that there’s someone who we should be helping and supporting and there’s someone that should be locked up and thrown away. There’s often a lot of support that both parties need.”
Another expert in domestic violence, Christine Murray had the following to say: “People tend to make assumptions about a person based on what they know about them. A lot of people would say, ‘That person is so charming. They’re a leader in the community. They could never be abusive.’ Just like for victims or survivors they might say, ‘They’re so educated. They’re so intelligent. How could they become a victim of domestic violence?’ Our feelings are filtered through our biases and assumptions, and the stereotypes and the attitudes that we hold.”
Undoubtedly, domestic violence is a problem that needs to be looked into and when we run into situations such as this trial, it does not work well for getting to the bottom of the situation and coming up with a solution.
Then again, there are those who ask why she didn’t just leave. She addressed this during the trial, saying: “He was the love of my life. But he was also this other thing. And that other thing was awful.”
She does admit that she hit Depp and there is evidence that they both used illegal substances. In the end, they are discovering that Amber Heard is not perfect but she also is not being taken seriously.
Perhaps Palombo expressed it best when saying: “Survivors are always watching, survivors are always listening. They’re always in the room, and they’re hearing how we respond, and for them, I think the big takeaway in this case is, ‘Wow, in coming forward, there’s so much to lose.'”