There are some things that most people know in life and it really doesn’t take much digging in order to confirm the fact that we have been right all along. For example, there is an old saying that you should ‘never burn your bridges behind you’. Yes, it may feel good to storm out of a job and give them a piece of your mind but when you ever have to cross that bridge again, you may find that it is no longer open to you. There is something else that is obvious, and that is the fact that staying friends with your ex is a bad idea.
If you have ever had the sting of a breakup smack you in your face, you realize that things can get ugly very quickly. In many cases, we may try to stay friendly at first, but that doesn’t mean it is always going to be the best idea. If you are somebody who has ever struggled with remaining friendly to an ex, you don’t really need anyone to tell you that doing so is a bad idea. As it turns out, however, science is behind you and psychologists are now saying that staying friends is not only wrong, it is challenging and can be difficult emotionally.
This came from a therapist, Nina Atwood, who is also the author of Temptations of the Single Girl. She says: “Wanting to be friends keeps you from feeling the full depth of the loss, softening the blow of the breakup. You may feel that this person knows you better than anyone else. Even if you’re not sexually attracted, you may still want the emotional intimacy that you shared.”
Then again, this can also make it more difficult to get beyond the relationship and have the feelings you once enjoyed.
When the dependency is not fully broken, you end up experiencing the same hurt feelings time and time again. According to psychologist Juliana Breines, when you stay friends with your ex, it can lead to a number of problems, including anxiety, jealousy, and more hurt feelings.
Most of us would be quick to admit that there are always going to be exceptions to the rule but relationship expert, Lindsay Kriger said that it is practically impossible to remain friends. She feels that it is best to completely move on, including blocking them on Facebook and deleting their number.
Each of us needs to make our own decision but sometimes, you just need to listen to what science has to say.