Ask anybody who takes care of the elderly and they will tell you that it does come with some challenges. It can affect them both on a physical and an emotional level and sometimes, it can even get the better of you. That is true anytime that you are dealing with someone who has special needs but when it comes to dealing with someone who has Alzheimer’s, the toll can be even more personal.
Caregivers experience more extreme problems as the disease continues to progress. At first, they may be there just to lend a helping hand but eventually, it seems as if they are caring for almost all of the responsibilities. It might include taking them shopping, going to doctors appointments or taking care of the home. That is difficult on a physical level but psychologically, knowing that your loved one is suffering in such a way can be devastating.
Julie Bick is very familiar with this type of situation. She cares for her father who was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s about a year ago. It happened shortly after her mother died so she moved in along with her two young children and became his primary caregiver. She’s done the best that she could but it involves taking things away, such as not letting him take his own medication. The keys to his truck are gone as is his freedom to a large extent.
“After some research, I found out that Alzheimer’s patients like routines and if you break them, they can get pretty upset and emotional,” she says.
One of the routines that her father really loves is talking every week with the local garbage man, Harold. He looks forward to it on Monday mornings and sometimes he walks down the driveway to meet the garbage truck. At times, she even leaves them alone so they can talk privately. She knows that he looks forward to it with all his heart and he has been a good part of the community for a long time.
“If we miss Harold when he comes, he will always go the extra mile to walk our cans back to our garage. I’ve heard other neighbors say that Harold will even knock on your door if the pickup day is around a holiday and you have forgotten to take your garbage out.”
Julie was feeling depressed on a recent Monday morning and was on the front porch crying. She didn’t want her father to see her upset. It was then that she heard the garbage truck coming and she saw her dad looking for a chair in the garage.
“I asked what he was doing and offered my help. He said he needed a chair to sit down, as he is very unstable on his feet. I asked, “Where would you like the chair?” as I was carrying it out of the garage. He requested I take it to the end of the driveway so he can visit with Harold.
As we were walking to the end of the driveway, my father stops me and says, “Harold is my friend. He is religious and I would like a moment with Harold so we can pray for you.” I gave him his space and walked back to the porch with my eyes loading up with tears. I remember thinking to myself as I was walking back to the porch that no matter what disease my father has, it will never take away his love for me.”
She looked over her shoulder as she headed back to the house and was moved by what she saw. She took this picture.
“A moment like that, you just don’t see every day,” she said.
“This simple act of kindness has touched me so much. Harold has touched my heart and I knew I had to share this with friends and family on Facebook. I did, and many asked me to please make the post public so they can share it. I have and this single post has reached thousands. There is so much good in this world, and it starts with simple acts of kindness. Harold, thank you for your kindness and prayers. I will never forget this moment.”
Harold has been coming to that house for years but he still doesn’t know much about the family. He does know that her father has Alzheimer’s and that he has been a friendly individual. All that being the case, he still took the time out of his route to show this man a little dignity.