There are times in life when we face adversity nearly too great to imagine. How we pick ourselves up and preserve in the face of unexpected hardships says everything about who we are and what’s inside us. Life is not fair, nor is it always kind, but no matter what, there’s always a path to a better tomorrow, it may be filled with broken glass and nails while demanding we walk it shoeless, but nevertheless, there is always a path. In this story, a woman discovered her husband cheated on her but decides to give him another chance. What happens next will inspire you.
My mother and father were married for ten years before she discovered that he was having an affair. He begged her forgiveness and then promised he would never be unfaithful again. Although she was devastated by my father’s adulterous acts, she apprehensively gave him a second chance. She did so because she felt it was in the best interest of her three sons: she thought that we needed our father. When she discovered that he continued the affair, what little chance he had at regaining her trust and restoring the marriage was utterly destroyed. Realizing that she could take no more, she kicked him out of the house and filed for divorce.
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Though my father agreed to the divorce, and the proceedings went smoothly, it was still the most challenging time in my mother’s life. The custody decision was left to us, and we all chose to live with our mom. She didn’t have a job. When my parents married, they agreed that she would be a housewife and full-time mother. Although she finished medical school in the Philippines, where my parents met, she wasn’t qualified to practice medicine in the United States since she hadn’t taken the ECFMG, the difficult cumulative medical exam that graduates of foreign medical schools have to pass practice medicine in America. She did not have a driver’s license because my father didn’t believe she needed one. Because public transportation in the suburbs was almost nonexistent at the time, doing everyday tasks was very difficult for her. There were times when all of us would hitchhike to Kmart.
Her entire family was thousands of miles away in the Philippines. I was five, my brothers were seven and ten, and we were not equipped to provide her with the kind of support that she needed. My mom cried an awful lot during those times! I remember listening through my bedroom walls at night, hearing her cry, and repeatedly asking the Lord to help her get through this. After phone conversations with my father, she would cry uncontrollably. Each time I heard her, I would do what she taught time to do when I really needed something: I prayed to God. Prayed to God to make my mom stop crying.
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Mom could’ve picked us up and moved us to the Philippines, where her parents were financially well-off. However, she wanted to be an American, and she wanted her kids to grow up as Americans. In 1979, I was in kindergarten. My brothers were in second and fifth grade. They were in school all day, but I was out at noon. Soon after the divorce was complete, she registered for driving lessons. I went with her to every lesson right after I got home from kindergarten. After a few months, she finished her lessons, passed her driving test, and got her driver’s license.
She was getting alimony from my father to support the family, but it was only about one-tenth of what he was making as an anesthesiologist. She made us of the money, though. She bought a 1980 Toyota Corolla. She drove this little car to a facility that helped prepare her fr that very important exam: the ECFMG. After ten years of not reading a medical book or gaining any medical experience, she decides to register for the examination.
While mothering three boys, she prepared to take one of the most challenging exams in the world. For a whole year, she read for hours a day. She read book after book, then followed that up by reading study guide after study guide. She went to Stanley Kaplan classes two or three days a week. She prayed, both at church and home…oh, how she prayed. She was relentless. When it was time to take the test, we drove from Frankfort, Illinois, to Des Moines, Iowa. A friend of hers who had graduated from the same university in the Philippines as my mother came with us. She was going to take her test, too.
We waited months for the result to come in the mail. Her friend got her results first, and she did not pass. When my mother’s result came in the mail, my brothers and I crowded around her as she opened the letter. She began crying. Then, fighting through the tears, she gleefully screamed, “I passed, my darlings! I passed! Now we can have everything we want. I am so happy!” I remember thinking after she said that, I do have everything I want. Mom’s happy again. From that point on, she began laughing and smiling a lot more. She stopped wasting tears on my father.
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My mother never had to preach the most important lessons in life. She showed us by example: how to get up after falling down and how anything is possible as long as you are willing to work hard. She showed us not to give up on love. Although, at times, love may fail you, if you keep trying, you will eventually find the one who is meant for you. After she became the woman she wanted to become, she fell in love with and married a man who was truly deserving of her. They remain happily married to this day.
Thanks for reading. Please be so kind as to pass this story along to your friends and family?
Sources:
- “Mom Gave Her Dad A Second Chance After She Caught Him Cheating. But Then This Happened.” Hrtwarming.